my thoughts on quitting social media in THE GUARDIAN!

A few months ago, I started writing a blog post about my decision to step away from my personal social media accounts, the many drastic changes I had noticed in myself and how I was feeling about the decision, over a year later.

Reflecting on everything I’d learned over the year, I was particularly taken by many ideas put forward in Johann Hari’s Stolen Focus which I read towards the end of 2022. Stolen Focus showed me social media is not the only problem contributing to the attention crisis. One of the key messages of Hari’s whole thesis could be summed up by this paragraph:

…the truth is more complicated. The arrival of the smartphone would always have increased to some degree the number of distractions in life, to be sure, but a great deal of the damage to our attention spans is being caused by something more subtle. It’s not the smartphone in and of itself; it is the way the apps on the smartphone and the sites on our laptops are designed. (p.123)

Social media is addictive, because they have designed it to be. So, essentially, what I’d broken was an addiction. And when you resist any kind of addiction, you are up against a powerful force.

This is something I also hadn’t appreciated until I read Johann Hari’s book, which demonstrates that both governments and tech giants have left the responsibility for solving this crisis firmly with the individual. Why should they impose safeguards or make platforms less addictive - the individual should take responsibility for how often they’re on their phone, limit their use, just delete the apps, etc. The truth is it’s really not that simple for most people, hence why this needs a collective, systemic solution rather than telling people they just need to be more disciplined and take control of their lives. It’s like beating any other addiction - you need support, accountability and proof that it is possible. Therefore, Hari suggests, people like me who have managed to successfully step away probably need to be the strongest voice for change.

So after I wrote my blog post, and was about to hit publish, I thought…I’m sure I’m not the only person who feels this way. Why not reach a bit higher? (that’s also been a noticeable change since I stepped away from social media - aiming higher and having the courage to put my hat in the ring!)

So I pitched the idea to Guardian Australia, who said yes, and the Thursday before last, it went live!

The response has been really fantastic. I am so thrilled that people have engaged with the spirit of my experiment and even been inspired to try it themselves! I have had some really lovely messages from people all over the world who have generously shared their experiences and opinions with me. It’s been so deeply comforting to know that it's not just me who found the rage and anxiety of social media untenable.

I have felt more seen and heard with the publication of this article than with anything I ever posted on social media! It is very clear to me where my energy is best spent now.

Honestly, quitting social media is one of the best things I’ve ever done. I wasn’t getting the value out of it that I might once have, all it was doing was making me feel anxious, stressed and unworthy. Without it, I have a lightness of spirit that I possibly haven’t felt since I was a child. I have felt freer, more confident, more connected, less influenced and less alone.

I really hope that more and more people realise that we do have a choice and maybe if we vote with our feet (or our delete button), the tech giants will be forced to make some changes. I feel relieved and grateful that I've been able to step out of it and gain some sense of balance and perspective.

While there have been a few downsides, which have been tricky to negotiate at times, I have loved this experiment. It has felt, and continues to feel, exciting and authentic and even a little bit rebellious to have opted out, to not be following the crowd. I have really loved blogging again too and intend to continue as I have been.

If what I’ve shared here doesn’t resonate with you, that’s absolutely fine. I realise that there are people out there who are brilliant at social media and at managing their emotions around it - it doesn’t have the same mental impact on them as it has on me and many others. That’s great! Humans are complicated beings and we are allowed to be different and inconsistent, stronger in some things than in others. Perhaps, like Leonie Dawson, I may return one day. After all, nothing is ever set in stone and our needs and values evolve over time.

The past year away from social media has taught me a lot. I feel stronger for all the lessons learned. I feel enlightened and more curious about the world. And I am committed to doing whatever feels most right for me in the current moment. My only job, as Elizabeth Gilbert once sagely advised me, is to serve my creativity. And right now, my creativity is best served by keeping on doing what I’m doing!

I look forward to continuing to sharing this journey with you, wherever it takes me. Let me know what you think of the article!


"But you can’t make people listen. They have to come round in their own time, wondering what happened and why the world blew up under them." - Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

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